Encouragement of the Black Female

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Up thinking about a program for young females that would teach them at an early age how to make healthy decisions.

One of the biggest downfalls in the Black community is the Black female’s inability to make good choices. We’re raised by the media instead of our mothers. In most cases our mothers are either out chasing men, or she’s too busy working multiple jobs to provide. When we’re raised by the media we value fat asses, thighs, long straight blonde hair, and misguided violence.

If we can just get to these girls before they dig holes for themselves by dropping out of school, not continuing on to college, or getting pregnant at an early age. We can really change the dynamics of our community. There are a lot of Black women out here who make great decisions, but our goal should be to completely eliminate unhealthy behavior and decision making in all of our men/women.

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The program should focus on Black females, not excluding males, but it should be openly conveyed to the young boys who’d like to participate that it’s for the encouragement of the Black female. Nothing should be directly designed for the young boy, everything should focus on her. When the young boy ask why none of the courses are design for him? Tell him that the woman she’ll soon become is design for him.

Religion vs Spirituality

Mike and I had a lil debate today about the difference between religion & spirituality. He’s a Christian and he identifies as spiritual, not religious.

His point was that religion is a practice and spirituality is the relationship one has with their higher power. He said that someone can be religious and not spiritual (vice versa).

My question: shouldn’t the two be intertwined…..

Him: look up the meanings of the words in the dictionary…..

Me: so you can be a Christian without practicing Christianity?

Him: some ppl go to church because they feel like they have to, but they really don’t focus on their connection with god. They’re too consumed with making sure they complete their rituals, when they should be concerned with knowing the Lord.

My question: why do a lot of Christians these days feel like it’s so important to differentiate themselves by identifying as spiritual rather than religious?

Him: it’s not about differentiating yourself….

My question: what’s so wrong with being religious? Everybody wants to call themselves spiritualist now, like religious comes with a side of herpes.

Him: there’s nothing wrong with being religious, it just doesn’t do anything for me. Why practice something if I don’t feel like it’s making my relationship with the Lord stronger….

Me: That’s a cop-out…. So going to church does nothing for your personal relationship with Jesus? (the question was aimed specifically at him, not a general question)…. I’m not saying you have to go to a physical building, cause history shows that ppl had church in the woods…. (We were using going to church to symbol all religious Christian practices)…. You’re using definitions created by some random person named Webster to justify your laziness. Most Christians are lazy, period. Y’all prefer to focus on the worthless distinctions between two words rather than using them interchangeably to help each other grow.

The conversation then started to go in circles, no love was lost during our dialogue…..

Although I’m not a Christian I’m still entitled to my opinion, and what I take away from my observations of average Christians. I think that if you identify as a Christian then you have to be religious and spiritual. If “Religious” describes action and “spiritual” refers to the feeling; I have relatively no respect for “Christians” who are comfortable NOT practicing (religious) what they preach (spirituality). To be a Christian you must first develop a spiritual relationship with Jesus, and then become religious about the connection you have with him. Meaning you need to perform the necessary rituals, or you’re not considered a Christian. Spirituality is like the “pre-christian” phase (yes, i just made that shit up). I think that you need to be spiritual before the ultimate step of becoming religious (a Christian), because if you did it the other way around it would be harder to reach your goals with God.

You don’t do a bunch of shit for somebody and then expect to fall in love afterwards. This backward ass thinking is probably why many women find themselves in relationships with males who they’ve made countless sacrifices for (ride-or-die bitches), but are still waiting for their return on their investment (unmarried females)…. Typically you fall in love first (spirituality) and then you do everything in your power to make that person happy (religious rituals).

The word “Christian” is thrown around too loosely….. If I were a Christian my goal would be to become both spiritually and physically (via rituals) connected to the Lord.

Niggas out here putting little to no significance on religious rituals, but they’ll wear their favorite jersey on game day for good luck. You think Olympians win gold by only having faith that they’ll win without practicing religiously?????

NBA players, practice. NFL players, practice. Artists, practice. Kids practice writing their ABC’s. Chemists, practice. Magicians, practice. Strippers, practice!

Seems like the only niggas who think they can get away with not practicing is you “Spiritual Christians”…. And to clear things up; people who are not spiritual but go to church and pray are not considered religious…. They’re just fake ass Christian too.

Fuck Outta Here! ~ Nonviolent Soldier

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A good portion of my friends and family are in the military or married to people in the military….. What’s really fucking me up is how many of them are against what’s happening in Ferguson. They’re exhausted with us posting about the situation, we have a bias opinion of the police, and violence is not the solution….

BITCH ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!?!

You’re in the military happily running to (or supporting troops in) Africa and the middle east to participate in wars (aka being violent without questioning the overall objective) for a muthafucking paycheck, but when it’s time to be war ready for your people you want to stop and ask questions and be diplomatic?!?!

Are you fucking serious?!?! Y’all fight Black and Brown people for the white man, and be proud of the shit, hollering “Hoorah” while your simple ass could possibly die. Expecting me to be grateful for your services, bitch fuck you! You were paid (payroll & benefits) for you reckless association with your country, AND I DON’T OWE YOU SHIT!!!! …. But let a black or brown person form any weapon against your beloved government and now you want to act like a bitch telling us we’re wrong about “Massa”….

These military niggas be posting shit about how they’re the reason we enjoy freedom; nigga kill yourself! You’re not fucking free and if you believe that your ignorance is worse than I thought.

I call it how I see and y’all are some BITCHES. Scared of the white man, talking about (in my bitch nigga voice) “well black people kill more black people than anybody else. We need to stop black on black violence because that’s ridiculous.”.  Oh so when your bitch ass go over to Africa on your so-called “relief & support” missions killing black and brown people (here and there), that’s not black on black crime??????

Nah, because the white man gave you a check for that, so that’s kool. Black people don’t pay you niggas enough huh?…..

I’m not sure if you fuck niggas forgot, BUT WAR IS VIOLENCE AND YOUR BITCH ASS WILLINGLY SIGNED UP FOR IT. You live/die by becoming a marine and now when you see people being violent towards white supremacy you’re all of a sudden against violence? Bitch I thought you was a muthafuck’n soldier?!?!

Sounds like you a bitch ass nigga to me. Y’all pick on the little guys, but when it comes to approaching the big bad bully (USA) in town y’all niggas want to start y’all fucking periods?!?!

Nobody in the military can tell me that millions of innocent black lives were not lost at war. You niggas want to call somebody out on being hypocrites, saying that we overlook black on black crime in our neighborhoods, but bitch you’re preaching nonviolence and you overlook what your organization is doing to predominantly black countries overseas.

HYPOCRITE!!!!!! NIGGA DID YOU SAY HYPOCRITE?!?!?! The nonviolent nigga who signed up for war?!?!?!!!!!!

Nah, not you?!!!! I know damn well that’s not what the fuck you said….

Lol boy I tell you, smh.

Suicide Via Pride

How much does freedom cost?

Sometimes I think about all the stubborn people who’ve killed themselves in honor of their freedom…. I’m not talking them stupid ass people who enlist in the military, and blindly take orders without question because somebody offered them a check…. I’m talking about those souls that were lost because they’d rather die than be reduced to something inferior. Like the movie Beloved, when the mother killed her children in the barn. Should we judge her like the people did in the movie? Is she crazy?

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Although I think suicide is some weak minded shit for someone like me to do; I still feel a particular type of honor when I read about slaves who jumped off ships and drowned themselves out of pride. I know it’s a contradiction and it sounds like a horrible thing to do, but I wouldn’t dear disrespect their decision.

I can only imagine how it feels to be so overwhelmed by such an emotion…. We live bullshit lives now; with our iPhones and our televisions. Many of us wouldn’t and couldn’t fathom that type of resolution.

Gunz & Butta

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Assets = Necessary Liabilities + Equity

Who’s responsible for teaching African American youth the difference between assets and unnecessary liabilities?

Watched the Movie “Baby Boy” not too long ago, and Ving Rhames character (Melvin) tried to explain the difference to them “little dumb muthafuckas” in the bedroom….. Judging by the financial choices I’ve seen African American males (ages 18-40) make over the past few yrs; Melvin’s message fell on deaf ears.

I know many people who’ve made great decisions with their money, but a lot of Black males still seem to have this subtle “make it rain” mentality. I said subtle because the average hood nigga can’t really afford to legitimately make it rain (if there’s such a thing).

Why do so many Black males make financially negligent decision?

I personally think it’s because they have self-esteem issues. The same reason a broke bitch will buy a $100 pack of weave before she saves $5 for her child’s tuition, is the same reason a basic nigga will buy 3 sets of rims before he owns a house.

They’re not interested in Guns….

And butter…. Well, butter makes them cum.

There’s something about expensive shit rapidly depreciating that makes bitches wet, and these niggas sign up for the benefits….. Sad thing about it is, most of these dudes know better, but the thirst for new pussy and the temporary high of shit’n on niggas taste too good.

So how do we convince a dumb nigga to stop consciously doing stupid shit?

We don’t….. Ignorance is comprised of the same substance as pride, dignity, and honor. Nobody can take your dignity away from you unless you let them. Unfortunately the same goes for ignorance.

A year from now, if you’ll certainly incur a substantial loss on something you purchased today; then it’s more than likely a bad investment. Especially if the object didn’t increase your productivity in the fist place…..

Melvin:

When you make paper, there are rules that go with it. You got to learn the difference between guns and butter. There are two types of niggas, niggas with guns… …and niggas with butter. What are the guns? That’s the real estate… …the stocks and bonds. Art work. Shit that appreciates with value. What’s the butter? Cars, clothes, jewelry, all the bullshit that don’t mean shit after you buy it. That’s what it’s all about: Guns and butter.

Underprivileged

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I would like to explain my definition of the word “underprivileged” as it pertains to African American youth.

When thinking of the words “underprivileged youth”; I can form an image of Black kids in urban cities playing sports with no equipment. Children at home with no internet access trying to complete a report for school tomorrow. Black students with scraggly first edition books full of outdated information…. I can imagine the kids who’s refrigerators are on “E” and kitchen cabinets prompting mothers to “please connect your charger”. Black fathers who’ve worked all day, only to rent space from another man so his family can have a damn near dilapidated building to call home. Examples of popular imagery of what it’s like to be an underprivileged Black kid in America.

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I think it’s time that Black people start redefining terms commonly used to describe our conditions. If my elders took the time to redefine ridiculous shit like the term “nigga” into an endearing word that means “friend”, then I can change the meaning of “underprivileged”.

My definition of being an underprivileged child has nothing to do with whether or not there was caviar or pizza rolls in my damn freezer.

Underprivileged youth are not children who are born into poverty. They are the children who are raised in households with no conscious parent present. These are the children who were left to learn their history from someone who could never share their perspective. Black children who’s celebrity role models teach them that liabilities like new cars and belligerent friends, alongside a phat ass are grand assets. Underprivileged youth are kids who are raised inside of stifling ignorance to historical economic and political events that sculpt modern day Black culture.

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Ruby Bridges

I was an underprivileged child, so I know these conditions very well…. I never felt underprivileged because my family didn’t own a big house, hell most people in the hood aren’t home owners…. I never felt underprivileged because my books at school were ugly and we didn’t have internet access. I can still make sense out of vandalized text, and what the fuck does watching fights on YouTube do for me?

I did however feel underprivileged when I noticed other young Black people who were raised by entire families of conscious individuals….. How come I didn’t have people like Malcolm X and DuBois in my family?…. Raised without a single Kwame Ture or Marcus Garvey in my life. I would have loved a William Whipper or William Hamilton…..

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Poverty is not the predominant factor that determines a Black child’s likelihood of success. I personally believe that the presence of consciousness has a greater influence on the child’s motivation and overall ambition…. Providing a child with an okay parent and a hundred new book is nice, but providing a child with a conscious parent and a few raggedy highly selected books is priceless.

The Courage for Positivity

I’ve been feeling a negative pressure. I don’t know what it is, the source, or how to stop it….. I could be mistaken, but I think I may have discovered where some of the pressure is stemming from….

I’m apart of a Lean In Circle at my job. Lean In Circles are usually small groups of people who share ideas, stories, and information. This particular lean in circle is a spinoff from a women’s association, so all our members are females.

There are all different types of women in our circle. Some of them are older, younger, American, Honduran, Indian, and even Bulgarian….

Today our topic was on how to balance the grounds in Corporate America with regards to gender. It kinda felt like a feminist meeting at first (which I was not fond of), but then it turn into a discussion about stereotypical behavior women indulge in.

There’s one other Black woman in our circle…. I was completely turned off by her demeanor. As the first negative words delivered at the conference table rushed from her lips, she whipped her head sarcastically. With more sass than necessary she delicately repositioned her weave that swooped just above her brow. She repeated the tossing of her head and fixing of her insecurity the entire time she complained.

I’m probably the only one who analyzed her delivery with mild disgust. In respect to her inappropriate display of character I still walked away with an idea. Maybe the negative pressure I’ve been feeling is a result of socializing with negative females. I desperately inventoried all the conversations I’ve had with other females over the past three months. Not one conversation was completely free of some form of non-constructive negative belief or gossip.

I’m not saying all Black women are negative beings. Maybe we’re just products of our environment and the negativity is produced elsewhere. What I do know is Black women unconsciously (but willingly) consume more negativity then any other group of women on the planet.

The more she shut her damn mouth; the more I enjoyed the meeting. Black women are far too obsessed with negative behaviors. Many of us would only speak 50 words a day if we were constraint to only speak optimistically. Even this post has an element of negativity, but when you negatively discuss negativity, the negatives cancel each other out.

I think Black people are way too kool….. We’re too kool to be completely optimistic and actually happy. I knew not to trust these hoes before I even found out that the heart shape that symbolizes love, isn’t the real shape of a human heart. Smh, taught not to trust before I was taught how to love.

Wish more Black women had the courage to be happy….. The courage to be optimistic about something other than abundant male attention….. I need to find the courage to replace my own negativity that keeps me comfortable….. Black America, where being a female and actually being free to be vulnerable is a platform for humiliation.